" Passion does not fade. It must be supressed "
writes Deepak Chopra.
" Boredom is just the passive face of this effort to keep desire out of sight, the indifferent mask you put on to hide a huge internal struggle . The belief that you won't ever get what you want implies enormoushatred and judgement against yourself . Keeping these feelings in control takes work , for even if you sincerely believe that you do not deserve to have desires, the vitality of life isn't going to be halted. "
I am picturing all the indifferent masks out there and all the energy it takes to keep them in place. What if that energy were put to some more creative use ?
I am feeling the internal struggles too. I know them well, all those inner conflicting thoughts..." you could put up posters , g ive out fliers and brochures to attract more business " and " nahh .. what's the use .. it's too much like hard work ... who would read them anyway "
Maybe we also sabbotage ourselves from being too successful by sincerely believing that we do not DESERVE to be successful.
I'm thinking of all the BORED teenagers , troubled adolescents in our schools ...what if.. what if behind these INDIFFERENT masks that we see .." I couldn't give a fuck " masks .. what if there are enormous resources of creative passion that are being suppressed out of FEAR ?
" FEAR OF LIFE is extremely common when someone complains of ennui " writes Chopra.
THe flow of life won't be stopped, a counterforce must be called in to oppose it - the countreforce of fear.
I ask myself :
AM I AFRAID OF LIFE ???
IN WHAT WAYS AM I AFRAID OF LIFE ?
IS IT MY FEAR OF LIFE ITSELF THAT IS SABBOTAGING ME ?
Is it all this fear and struggle that are making me feel tired and apathetic ???